Your Weekly Big Brother Power Rankings - Way Behind on Week 11

Last Week’s HOH: Vanessa, and then Liz for the double eviction

Last Week’s Original Nominees: James and Meg

Veto Winner: James

Did he use the veto?: Of course he did, and Julia was put up in his place

Votes for Eviction: Everyone voted to evict Meg except James iin one of the most infuriating moves in the history of the game. Then, in the double eviction, Liz put up James next to John and he was booted unanimously.

New Head of Household: After the double eviction was complete, Steve won HOH for the next week.  Suck it, Austwins.

Any new twists?: After Meg’s eviction, the houseguests immediately played their first HOH comp of the night, where Liz won.  She put up James and John, and then Julia won veto.  Ultimately she chose not to use it, and James was evicted.  Annoyingly, it was a good night for Austwins.

This week - Steve is HOH, and Austin and Liz are currently on the block (which took place in Sunday’s episode).

OUR THOUGHTS:

JAIME: So that might have been one of the most infuriating weeks of the entire season, let alone the entire game.  Double evictions are supposed to be exciting, and hopefully are when the houseguests make the big moves and get out the players that normally would be difficult to evict.  So instead they evicted Meg.

GARRETT: Steve was apparently up all night trying to figure out what to do. But he decided that he couldn’t risk upsetting Vanessa and left the Austwins in the game intact. It was super dumb, and I really hope he looks back on it after the season is over and realizes as much.

JAIME: Thankfully for everyone, once he won HOH for the week, he made up for his mistake (well, at least for now.  I don’t know if fans will ever be able to forgive him for letting a solid three-person alliance make it to the final six).  

GARRETT: John is also at fault, but he gets a bit more of a pass because he was definitely willing to flip the vote if that’s what Steve decided to do.

JAIME: Definitely.  The problem was Steve was well aware that evicting Julia would be a better move.  He fully saw the benefits of that move, and didn’t do it.  I couldn’t even talk during the episode.  For a while there, it looked like the season had been handed right over to Austwins.

GARRETT: Instead, now, it’s been handed right over to Vanessa. She’s definitely the favorite to win at this point, which is crazy, because I feel like in a season with more awareness from the other players, she would have been evicted much earlier. I don’t think she’s very good - it’s just that she’s better than the people who are left.

JAIME: As always, when it came time for Steve to start figuring out his nominations, Vanessa was right in his ear.  The obvious targets have to be Austwins, but Vanessa helped Steve figure out the best way to set up the nominations, so they’re not potentially put in a situation where, after the veto, Steve would be forced to put him a member of his own alliance.  But as always, Johnny’s cautious of Vanessa, so while going after the twins is the reasonable move, and Steve’s intention, Johnny points out that it wouldn’t be a bad thing to target Austin, either, because it cuts off the possibility of Vanessa turning on them and teaming up again with Austin, since she’s worked with him for most of the game so far.

GARRETT: As it stands episode-wise, Steve took both John and Vanessa’s advice and nominated Austin and Liz. Liz freaked out at the nomination ceremony and bolted from the table, crying. It was ridiculous. In live-feed world, we know who won Veto, but we’ll leave that out of this post so that Wednesday’s episode can be enjoyed without spoilers.

JAIME: Though, I’m sure it’ll be covered in depth on Wednesday’s episode, but I don’t think it’s spoilery to announce to everyone that finally, our long national nightmare is over.  That’s right, folks: Austin and Liz have broken up.  I won’t get into the reasons why, but they’re over.  Suddenly this season seems enjoyable again.

Wait - in a twist worthy of Julie Chen herself, I have been informed that since their break-up on Saturday, Austin and Liz have been spotted making out on the feeds.  Apparently they worked things out.  This is terrible.  Never mind, I hate everything again.

GARRETT: Sorry to break the news like that. Regardless, Wednesday’s episode should be fun. I think CBS is pretty aware of our hate towards that relationship, and they’ve been showing it pretty snidely the past few weeks. Once the attractive, All-American couple Clelli was broken up, CBS must have given a long groan that Liztin is now who they’re stuck with.

JAIME: His beard, though.  I don’t even want to think about it.  Anyway, back to the events of this week.  With James and Meg out of the house, and with the final six formed, the house is split evenly, at least to us viewers: there’s Vanessa/Steve/John on one side, and Austwins on the other.  Steve’s nominations drew some pretty serious lines in the sand, and effectively ended the Scamper Squad before it really even got off the ground.

This week, our post is going to work a little differently.  Since we’re getting close to the end of the season, we wanted to take some time to evaluate how the season’s gone, and potentially how the next few weeks might play out, given who’s left and how they’ve played the game so far.  But first, let’s get to this week’s rankings:

6/5. Liztin

4. Steve

3. Julia

2. John

1.Vanessa

JAIME: So rather than go individually through each player this week, we’re going to look at everyone overall as we try to figure out where the rest of the season could go, and where we’d like it to go.

So first, obviously, Austwins has to go.  Numbers-wise, the rest of the house would have had a better advantage if they’d managed to get at least one of Austwins out last week, either Julia during the first eviction or someone during the second eviction.  That didn’t happen, which means that now it’s going to be war.  For some reason, Liz is really, really hurt that someone would choose to work with Vanessa and John over her, her boyfriend, and her sister.  It’s such a short-sighted move, and I genuinely don’t think Austwins has ever talked about what their alliance would do if they got to the final four or five.  It doesn’t seem like they’ve ever thought that far ahead, because if they had, then it would be understandable why they have to be targets this week.  They should have been targets a long time ago, actually, but what do I know, I’m not in the house.

GARRETT: The move to evict Meg was a decision in a long line of them this summer that should have gone another way. It’s funny - because Meg was often at the forefront of a lot of those choices. Off the top of my head, there was failing to see the Jason blindside coming, the eviction of Shelli over Vanessa, betraying Becky’s trust, and then finally, getting bit by the Austwins in the double eviction. Meg was truly one of the worst players that’s ever played the game, and that’s really saying something. It was awful to take her out over Julia, but at least now, maybe, MAYBE, Steve and John can beat the pretty large odds and get to the end.

JAIME: John and Steve are in a slightly precarious position for now because they’re obviously much bigger targets to Austwins than Vanessa.  John winning HOH this week would pretty much solidify a final three of himself, Steve, and Vanessa, but otherwise, one of them would absolutely go home.  Steve might be a bigger target coming out of this week, but John is harder to beat at comps, and with so few people left, that’s huge.  Neither of them are playing the games they need to be playing.  Sure, Steve finally made a big move and split up the house, but he could have done that last week, which would have left him in a much more comfortable position this week.  He’s not calling the shots so much as he’s taking advantage of the only option he has.  John at least is a bit more strategic, but he’s been able to hide behind Vanessa and now Steve for so long that he’s not in control of anything.  He’s a strong person to have in an alliance, but he’s never been the one to lead an alliance, and I don’t see that changing, especially if they’re able to get out a second member of Austwins next week and John just becomes even more comfortable.

GARRETT: I wouldn’t count on anyone winning anything at this point in the game. I think the only obvious thing is Vanessa sitting right in the middle - and while she’s on John and Steve’s side, she’s still had endgame deals with Austin and Julia for weeks. A Liz eviction only puts her closer to the end. It’s another reason why failing to knock out the Austwins earlier was a horrible decision - Vanessa wins the game over all of the people left in the house, no matter what. By the time Austwins are eliminated (assuming that’s the way it goes), Vanessa is left in the final three. It’s just so baffling how somebody so erratic, overemotional, and high strung can have herself in the best position to win.

JAIME: Ultimately Vanessa is undoubtedly in the best position right now.  She’s close with Steve and John, she’s close with Austwins, and once Austwins’ numbers start dwindling, I don’t know if she wouldn’t turn on Steve and John.  She’s going to do whatever she has to do to win, and the only reason she couldn’t stick with Austwins throughout the entire game was because they outnumbered her.  But now that they’ll be down to two members?  There’s no way to predict what Vanessa will do.  I doubt even Vanessa knows what she’ll do.

She’s in a position similar to Julia: Steve/John will be targeting the bigger threats of Austin and Liz.  Austwins will be targeting Steve and John, since Vanessa is working with them.  There isn’t as much attention on Vanessa and Julia, and unless Steve and John finally figure out that Vanessa will probably turn on them if she’s able to and evict her, I think Vanessa and Julia might skate through to the final three.  Definitely final four.

GARRETT: I think it’s just been a common symptom of these players this year. All of them have had “final five” in their heads for so long instead of trying to position themselves for a win. The perception levels have been painfully low this season - even from Vanessa, who we’ve seen come up with audacious theory after audacious theory throughout this entire game. She’s got herself in the best spot, but it’s still pretty funny that she thought Johnny Mac and Clay were gay lovers. I mean, come on.

JAIME: Let’s not forget that her first thought was that they were cousins.  And if not cousins, then they were in a relationship.  Because clearly it was one of those two options.

GARRETT: And Da’Vonne “as clear as day” never had that stupid phone call power. Whatever. At least the Big Brother takeover nonsense was taken out of the equation early.

JAIME: I do wonder how the game would have gone if there had been more takeovers.  Since clearly the vast majority of the houseguests were incapable of saving their own game or even creating a strategy based on their own merit.

GARRETT: I’m glad they didn’t happen for the sake of the integrity of the game, but these houseguests have really been frustrating. The #BB17 hashtag during the double eviction episode was a warzone. And I was thinking about quitting the season, to be honest.

JAIME: After that double eviction, I was waiting to see how the second HOH comp went, but I was close, too.  I could not watch them hand the entire season to Austwins.  Obviously you can’t control this game, and you can’t control who makes it to the end.  But this season had so many strong and/or interesting players evicted early, and to have a final six made up of three people who have never had to fight even a little bit to stay in the game...I couldn’t imagine the thought of one of them winning.  It took until day 80 for Austin to even get nominated the first time.  John’s been nominated something like five or six times and Austin didn’t get nominated until day 80.  What kind of gameplay is happening in this house?

GARRETT: It would have been awesome to see Audrey cool her jets and make it further than she did. She was wildly entertaining and her game was built for late stage Big Brother. It just sucks that she stepped on the gas before the light turned green. She was aggravating and that hibernation in the diary room was a bit scary, but she was great entertainment. I hope they bring her back for All-Stars and she starts the game off a little better.

JAIME: I think that’s one of the biggest problems I have with the season overall.  They were all so gung ho about pointing out strong players at first, but most of the time, they were labeling people strong players before they’d even really done anything.  Remember early on when everyone kept talking about being intimidated by Steve because of how smart he was?  Because he knows the word “trombonists”?  They were playing the game based on unfounded fear, before they really felt out any of the other houseguests, and in doing so, they let Austwins and Meg make it way too far.  They were all eager and willing to get out the “huge threats” like Jason, and were so focused on it that they lost perspective and any long-term view of the game.  In a way, that might all be Vanessa’s fault - she orchestrated almost every single eviction, and has a knack for getting people to come around to her way of thinking.  I’m going to make a bold statement and say that all of the upsetting, boring, or frustrating parts of the season were Vanessa’s fault.

GARRETT: You’re not wrong, especially when a lot of the frustration occurred because the other houseguests have been so hogtied by Vanessa’s opinion. She’s ruthlessly intimidating, and it’s hard for a socially awkward kid like Steve to stand up to someone like that. It sucks that the only people that really saw through it - Becky and Audrey - were quickly sent right on their way.

JAIME: It’s really frustrating as a fan of the game to see how Vanessa has managed to work everyone in the house.  We’ve talked about her game and all its flaws a lot, so I won’t get into all of that again, but it’s really annoying to see that the best game in the house has so many issues.  It’s easy to see how she’s made it this far in the game, and she does deserve to win and is probably best positioned for a win, but it’s frustrating.  You can’t root for her in the same way you could root for Evel Dick or Janelle because there’s no self-awareness.  Even in the DR, she doesn’t admit that she’s doing what she can to stay afloat each week, or that she knows certain players respond well when she’s emotional.  To the viewers, it just looks like a mess.  But because she’s so good at getting people to agree with her, she’s gotten out anyone who ever stood up to her, and in doing so, got rid of people who potentially could have played a game worthy of winning half a million dollars.

GARRETT: Let’s at least hope that now that the target is on Austwins, we’ll get a bit more drama. Wednesday’s episode should be a good one.

But First Fridays: Your Weekly Big Brother Power Rankings - Week 10

SPOILER ALERT: As has been the case for the last few weeks, this week’s HOH competition/juror buyback ran past the live show, so keep away if you want to wait until Sunday’s episode to find out the outcome.

Last Week’s HOH: Austin (gag)

Last Week’s Original Nominees: Steve and our boy Johnny

Veto Winner: Vanessa

Did she use the veto?: No, after giving a spectacularly petty speech meant to embarrass Steve

Votes for Eviction: 5-0 to evict John

New Head of Household: Vanessa.  God help us all.

Any new twists?: John won the buyback competition, meaning that he was able to reenter the house after being evicted for about twenty minutes.  And next week is another double eviction, so this could potentially be an incredibly interesting week or a painfully boring one.

OUR THOUGHTS:

JAIME: Oh, what a week.  Well, just like I predicted last week, Austin and Liz spending all their time in the HOH room meant we once again had to see some gross things on the feeds.  So, needless to say, I didn’t watch the feeds all that much this week.

GARRETT: Nor did I. The fact that those two think they’re loved by America would be mindboggling if it wasn’t so painfully obvious how pompous and conceited they are.

JAIME: Austin started off his week in a pretty terrible position.  He had made deals with just about everyone in the house, and now that the pool of potential nominees is so much smaller, he had no idea who to put up.  He was set on John, the only person he hadn’t made any kind of deal with, but he’d promised James and Meg that neither of them would go up, which meant his options were Steve or Vanessa.  Lots of back and forth ensued, lots of Austin feeling bad for himself for being in this position, lots of me not caring.  Ultimately, while he was fine with either John or Vanessa going home, he knew that Vanessa staying in the house would be better for his game - but he’d already promised Steve that he wouldn’t go up.  But once again Vanessa managed to sway Austin, and he wound up putting Steve and John on the block.

After an appearance by Zingbot (where Liz was zinged because Austin has a girlfriend, and Austin was just called smelly, because, you know, that’s fair), it was time for the veto competition, where one-by-one, players were shown a picture with three houseguests’ features mixed up, and the player had to correctly identify who was shown.  The fastest time won the veto.  Julia, in her first veto competition, was the time to beat for most of the game, until Vanessa came in and finished in two fewer minutes than Julia.  

With Vanessa winning the veto, Johnny decided to tell her about the five-person alliance they’d formed last week, in the hopes that it would help make Vanessa loyal to him and turn on Austwins, and eventually use the veto on him.  And it kind of almost worked: Vanessa confirmed the existence of the alliance with Liz, who wrote it off as just an idea of Steve’s that she, Austin, and Julia went along with.  With the blame for the alliance all on Steve, Vanessa flipped out, and had a few very mature conversations with him where she calmly listened to his explanation and ultimately understood that it was something he did to improve his standing in the house.  No, I’m totally messing with you, that didn’t happen at all.  It’s Vanessa, come on.  She cried and screamed at Steve and mocked him.

Despite her anger at Steve, and despite her incredibly petty and immature veto speech in which she yelled at Steve for hurting her feelings (by, you know, playing the game), Vanessa decided not to use the veto.  

GARRETT: The TV editing made it seem like Vanessa was either going to use the veto on John or flip on the Austwins and evict Steve, but, as with everybody else left in this game, she refused to vote against Liz and Julia.

JAIME: And on Thursday night, John was evicted by a unanimous vote - until, of course, the buyback competition, which brought Shelli, Jackie, and Becky back to compete alongside John for the right to reenter the house.  The competition, which was combined with the HOH competition, had all the players holding onto a rope that swung around in a circle, occasionally hitting obstacles along the way that would quickly spin them.  The last juror remaining would win the buyback, and potentially could win the HOH as well.

This was an incredibly quick competition, and by that I mean in the time it took me to come upstairs the moment the episode finished airing, open my computer, and turn on the feeds, it was pretty much over.  Apparently Jackie, Shelli, and Becky (possibly along with some of the houseguests) were disqualified for crouching too low on the rope, which seems like a fault on the producers for not explaining it well enough, but what do I know.  Ultimately Vanessa won the HOH, with John coming in second place and winning the buyback comp.

GARRETT: I was so mad during the episode (for those of you that follow me on Twitter, sorry for the outbursts, but such is the life) that I didn’t even watch the feeds for the rest of the night. John is back in, but only after telling Julie Chen that he wants Meg evicted over the twins. I’m more jaded with this show right than I’ve ever been, honestly. I really don’t like anybody.

JAIME: It was a really long week in the house, and unfortunately, I don’t think anyone really made any big moves.  But let’s get to this week’s power rankings:

8. Meg

GARRETT: We should really have a running tally of the poor decisions Meg has made so far. I feel like we detail it every week in these posts, but every go round, she always finds a way to make a decision that, from the outside of the house, looks just so clearly incorrect. This week, it happened on Wednesday night, as John was making his final push to stay in the house and flip the game on the Austwins. There was a prime chance to do it, but Meg, in classic fashion, ran to Austin and tattled on the idea, making him confirm his final five with the twins and James. Now, this week, Vanessa inexplicably is refusing to target the twins, and Meg is in the crosshairs. But I’m not happy, because a Meg nomination means an eviction of whoever is sitting next to her. It may just be James this week, which would add yet another of Meg’s “peeps” to the jury.

JAIME: Oh, Meg.  For some inexplicable reason, Meg thinks she has a lot of control in the house.  She doesn’t seem to realize that there are only eight people left, and when she’s only strong with one other person, that means she could very easily go at any time.  She’s still done absolutely nothing, and oh my god when is anyone going to realize that Austin, Liz, and Julia are three votes who absolutely are not going to turn on each other.  Every week that goes by, the worse Meg looks.  She hasn’t won a single competition, and adds no value to the house whatsoever other than adding a number.  And the worst part is I don’t think she’s going anywhere - John might be targeting her, but that’s it.  Everyone knows they can always beat her in a comp and that she can go whenever they want her to go, so they’re free to keep her as long as they want.  She’s done absolutely nothing to earn her place in the game and I am so, so tired of seeing her joking about how useless she is at comps.

7. John

JAIME: As sad that I was that John was evicted, I don’t know if him winning the buyback comp was the best possible outcome.  I’m glad there’s still someone in the house that I actually care about, but there’s a huge chance that this week will just be a repeat of last week.  I don’t know if I see John surviving the double eviction, and I think that another juror (especially Jackie or Becky) would have had a greater chance of actually shaking things up in the house.  I don’t know.  I’m torn, because Johnny is hands down my favorite houseguest, but game-wise, he’s got to step it up and realize that all the people he’s chosen to work with are absolutely out to get him.

GARRETT: John had chance after chance to play this game, and as funny as he is, it really pissed me off to see him say that he wanted Meg evicted over Austwins. I want to root for him, but part of me knows there’s no chance of him winning the big prize anyway after having been evicted already. I just think bringing back a houseguest that was fairly eliminated from the competition is cheap and tacky, and interrupts the flow of the game. I loved when Kaysar came back into the game way back in Season 6, but looking back on it, just because I loved him doesn’t mean it was right, and I’m glad he got a second comeuppance that same week. So now, rooting for John to win anything other than America’s Favorite Player just feels dirty. As for his game, it looks like he may be aligning with his once-enemy Vanessa, and should be alright for the first eviction. But if power flips back to the twins, he’s a goner. And if it happens, I won’t be that upset.

6. Steve

JAIME: Considering that Vanessa blew up at him last week, I think it’s safe to say that he’s probably going to be her biggest target.  He’s in a slightly better spot than John because I think Vanessa is really the only one with a huge vendetta against him; still, I don’t know how likely it is that he’ll survive the double eviction.  We’ve been saying for weeks that these players need to break up the Austwins block, but if James and Meg still insist on playing nice with them, Steve and John are the first to go.  So hopefully they step it up so I can continue supporting them.

GARRETT: I would probably like Steve, but he lets people get in his head so much that he physically can’t speak when he’s confronted about something (like Vanessa yelling at him in Wednesday’s episode). You can be a huge fan and know exactly what the right move to make is, but when you get so intimidated to the point of hyperventilation, your presence is pointless. Steve lost this game when he evicted Jackie in the first double eviction. He had the big move in front of him and didn’t take it.

5. James

GARRETT: As has been the case throughout the entire game, James is putting his fate in serious jeopardy through his alliance with Meg. Meg refuses to use any logic, and gets James questioning himself whenever it seems like he might be about to make the right decision. This week, both of them tried to volunteer to go up as a pawn. It’s baffling. $500,000 on the line and the man wants to risk himself for eviction. As with John, another truly likable guy, but he’s got a hollow head when it comes to playing big Brother. Unless the course of action is so obvious it’s punching him in the face (like putting Clay and Shelli on the block), you just can’t count on him to actually make a big move - something he incorrectly says he’s capable of.

JAIME: This is why I was hoping Jackie would win the buyback comp.  With Jackie by his side, James had a chance of actually getting some control back, and more importantly, gaining some perspective.  He absolutely does not have the numbers to win this game, or really control anything.  Whatever game moves he makes, even if they’re smart, are absolutely pointless as long as he doesn’t see the dangers of keeping Austwins.

4. Julia

JAIME: Julia is kind of pointless.  She’s sort of the Meg of Austwins: she hasn’t won anything, and she’s not really more than just a number.  But unlike Meg, Julia has strong people behind her, and given her connections to Liz and Austin, she’s not going anywhere.  As long as everyone keeps falling all over themselves to work with Austwins, they’re going to stay in control of the house, and Julia is going to walk right to the final three.  How thrilling.

GARRETT: She also just made a final two with Vanessa (in the event that Liz gets evicted), so that’s another eye roll from me. Julia is a huge disappointment that we should have seen coming. I like her better than Liz, but if you’re in a competition over who’s hated less, nobody is a winner. It means something that we write less on Julia every week than anybody else.

3. Liz

GARRETT: I just really don’t like Liz. I think she’s annoying and petty and a truly mean human being. She sits back and talks more trash than anybody this side of Maggie from Season 6. She takes everything personally while accusing everybody else of taking things personally. She’s rude and has a horrible attitude and only got on the show because her and Julia met Porsche from S13 on a yacht. I usually love to hate people in Big Brother. Austin, I hate, but I love to hate him because he’s so ridiculous and I know that the long wait will be worth it when he’s finally evicted. But Liz just makes me irrationally angry. There’s nothing about her I enjoy and she makes the show worse. I have nothing to say about her gameplay, other than the fact that again, after two months of this, I still don’t understand how people won’t target her.

JAIME: I cannot for the life of me figure out why no one has ever targeted her.  She’s the center of a three-person alliance, and we’re at the point in the game where three votes are the majority in an eviction.  How does nobody see that?  How is no one threatened by that?  Like Julia, she gets to just sit back and watch as she advances further and further in the game.  I could understand if they were actively working to protect their alliance and make themselves be seen as helpful rather than harmful, but seriously?  They’re not doing anything to make themselves seem like less of a threat, and yet nobody is threatened by them.  It’s not even fun anymore to watch these houseguests misread this situation.  It started getting sad a long time ago.  Austwins don’t deserve to win the game, but right now, none of the other houseguests do either if they can’t even acknowledge the largest threat in the game, and won’t lift a finger to do something about the huge obstacle between them and $500,000.  Austwins are going to be the final three and everyone else is going to be evicted and be surprised at how they managed to get fooled so badly, and they won’t have anyone to blame but themselves.

2. Austin

JAIME: First of all, it anyone hasn’t read Austin’s HOH blog, please do yourself a favor and read it.  A true intellectual, Austin is clearly leaps and bounds above the other players, and it’s no wonder that he’s playing a vastly superior game.  No, that’s not true at all.  Austin sucks.  He spent his week as HOH making deals with both sides of the house, and burying himself in deals and promises that he refused to even think about breaking.  But he’s absolutely untouchable right now: he’s got Liz and Julia behind him, and usually Vanessa.  I think it’s incredibly likely that he and/or Liz will win another HOH this season, and at this point, if someone from their alliance doesn’t go home during the double eviction, then they won’t be going home at all.  Austin, Liz, and Julia are in total control of the votes now, and for everyone’s eagerness to join up with them, no one realizes that they have no chance of beating them.  Once we get down to five or six people, there is absolutely no way to evict one of Austwins, unless the HOH isn’t one of them and puts up two of them against each other.  The worst thing about Austin, really, is how obvious his power in the house is, and how everybody refuses to act on it.  Austin’s continued presence is making me hate everyone else and hate this season.  Please do better, houseguests.

GARRETT: I want the professor that accepted Austin’s graduate thesis fired. The HOH blog and that absurd nominations speech only further show just how far Austin’s head is up his own ass. He’s a petulant child who whines when he doesn’t get his way - but he gets his way a lot more than not. I’ll give him credit for his only good game move (and maybe this season’s best, which is so unbelievably sad) in avoiding the block all the way back in week 4. And as I said above, I still love to hate Austin, just because he’s so cartoonishly ridiculous. But that will change when it really becomes apparent that he’s in no danger of going home.

1.Vanessa

JAIME: It’s been ten weeks, and I am officially annoyed by absolutely everything about Vanessa’s gameplay.  She lies to everyone but cries and gets personally offended when anyone lies to her; she controls everything but then can’t understand why anyone might ever potentially consider the possibility of evicting her.  She thinks she’s the only person who understands how to play this game, and yet she jumps down everyone’s throats the second they do anything even remotely connected to playing out a strategy.  So no, I’m not a Vanessa fan.  But unfortunately, she’s playing the best game in the house.  How sad is that?  With Austwins by her side, right now, she’s pretty much untouchable.  They’re going to continue to dominate and picking everyone else off, and there’s nothing we can do about it.  Joy.  I’m sure she’s going to cry a lot more, too, so everyone get pumped.

GARRETT: They had her chance to get rid of her and blew it. You don’t get many chances to take out a player like Vanessa - who, as insane as she can be, is incredibly intimidating and smart with her words. I don’t think there’s a player in history quite like Vanessa, who acts so volatile and won’t admit to her own lies in the diary room. I just don’t get how she doesn’t see how off her rocker she is. I just want one quote from her admitting to it. Just one. And all will be forgiven. But she’ll get no respect from me until she does that, even if she does walk away with the grand prize. She’s number one this week because of her HOH and puppeteering of the people she intimidates, but in a season filled with so many bad players, it’s really not that much of an accomplishment.

But First Fridays: Your Weekly Big Brother Power Rankings - Week 9

SPOILER ALERT: Last night’s live HOH competition again carried on after the close of the episode, and the conclusion will be shown on Sunday’s episode. But, as with the past few weeks, we know who won, so we’ll be factoring in the results of the competition into the rankings this week.

Last Week’s HOH: Liz

Last Week’s Original Nominees: Becky and Johnny Mac

Last Week’s Veto Winner: Liz

Did she use the Veto?: No, though CBS’s editing made it seem like she was going to backdoor Vanessa

Votes for Eviction: 6-0 to evict Becky

New Head of Household: Bring out the pitchforks, folks, because Austin won

Any New Twists?: After next week’s live eviction, the evicted houseguests and the three jury members (Shelli, Jackie, and Becky) will compete to see which of them will be returning to the game. But you already knew that.

OUR THOUGHTS:

GARRETT: I’ve been watching this show for a long time, and right about now is where I start getting frustrated. Usually it’s because a player I don’t like is dominating the game, or because the majority of houseguests aren’t acting logically and start making wrong decisions. Both of those situations have started happening this season.

It started last week, when Liz took Head of Household. At the beginning of the week, it looked like there was a split between sides of the house. Liz put up John and Becky, and with Vanessa in her ear, it looked like John would be the target for the week. After the nomination ceremony, however, John took the target off his own back with a brilliant display, finally opening up to the Austwins about how he’s wanted Vanessa out since the second week of the game. Believing John wouldn’t target them, Austwins shifted their target to Becky, and told John that even though he was on the block, he’d be safe for the week. Inexplicably, Johnny then decided that the best way to earn the trust of the Austwins was to throw the Veto competition.

The Veto competition was a rock music rendition of the fan-favorite OTEV competition, and Johnny threw the competition in the first round. Becky gave it her all and badly hurt her toe in the process, but Liz took the competition, and held all the power for the week. CBS’s edit made it seem like she would backdoor Vanessa, but, wanting to keep the big target in the game, Liz kept her nominations the same.

The rest of the week unfolded without much drama, and while Becky gave it her best shot to stay, she was evicted in a unanimous vote. The HOH competition was an interesting track meet kind of thing, where the houseguests needed to run to their button when prompted. As expected Meg was eliminated first before the episode ended, and then, an hour later, Austin managed to win the competition, keeping the power within his triad and enraging the internet community.

Now, the Austwins have power for the second week in a row, and they have an alliance with everybody. Nobody seems to realize that they are a three vote block, and the contentedness of the rest of the house of keeping them in the game is maddening. Now, we have to deal with a lot of Austin airtime this week, so we hope you understand our crankiness in this week’s rankings:

8. Meg

JAIME: In true Meg style, she was the first person eliminated from the HOH competition and then proceeded to laugh about it.  Listen, Meg.  I get it.  I’m not good at sports or doing things either.  But we’re up to the final eight and she hasn’t won a single competition.  She’s done absolutely nothing to justify her place in the final eight, and I can’t see that changing anytime soon.  And the worst part is that I’m sure she’s going to make it much farther in the game.  No one would ever vote for her to win the game, so I wouldn’t be surprised if she makes it to the final three or even two.  But at least her continued presence in the game gives me a reason to drink.

GARRETT: Meg isn’t a mean person. She’s extremely nice, in fact. When there’s no gameplay going on, I really enjoy her presence. But week after week, one of her allies goes. And week after week, she keeps telling James that they need to keep working with the Austwins. She’s definitely getting dragged to the final four by somebody. I just hope James is right there with her in the end.

Great faceplant highlight in the OTEV competition, though. Glad she’s not concussed.

7. Vanessa

JAIME: Thanks to Becky and John, by now, everyone in the house is onto Vanessa and her hyper-aggressive style of gameplay.  Liz was in the perfect spot to get her out, but didn’t want to get blood on her hands (which, can someone please explain to Liz what it means to get blood on your hands?  If you set up the eviction of someone literally everyone in the house wants evicted, there is zero blood on your hands).  Now with Austin, it’s hard to predict what he might do - I think he’d be more willing than Liz, but it wouldn’t be hard for Vanessa to convince him how vital she is to his game.  She’s good at playing people, and if she can adapt to being uncovered and find a way to turn that and use it to her advantage, she’ll be golden.  There’s a chance she might get put up this week, but I don’t know, I have a feeling she’ll skate by yet again.

GARRETT: Vanessa’s been pretty off kilter emotionally for a couple weeks now. She seems to know she’s being ostracized in the house. And I don’t blame her for getting upset when people are calling her the second Audrey. The Big Brother house is really brutal sometimes, and I’ll give her credit for sticking through it. But I just can’t bring myself to be a fan of her when she keeps steadfastly believing her own lies. It’s those lies that have gotten her in trouble. But, as Jaime said, there seems to be a reluctance from Liz and Austin to get her out of the game. So we’ll see what happens with her this week.

6. John

GARRETT: I think it’s important to keep our opinions of the houseguests’ personalities and their gameplay separate, because oftentimes, the most likable person in the game can be one of the worst players. Donny wasn’t a great strategist last season, but he lit up the house with his charm and was a really enjoyable player to watch. It’s starting to appear that our dear John is in that category, because he’s made some of the most abysmal decisions I’ve seen in the game so far. Deciding to throw a competition when you’re on the block is a cardinal sin, no matter who you are. It’s inexcusable with $500,000 on the line. And deciding to join an alliance with the Austwins is an absurd notion when they’re a three vote block in an eight person household. John is still a delight in the diary room and is one of the best Big Brother personalities in a long, long time. But he lost all game sense when Clay got evicted, and if he stays any longer, it’ll be through no effort of his own.

JAIME: I’m in a pickle here.  I love Johnny Mac.  I have waited the entire game for Johnny Mac to start stepping up, so I could finally say that my love for him as a player was justified.  But what is he doing?  Sure, okay, he was on the block this week, so he needed to work with Austwins since they controlled a third of the vote.  So I can understand his decision to work with them, and I think in his unedited conversation with Steve about choosing an alliance to work with, he was pretty unwilling.  To be charitable, and because I’m not yet willing to give up on my dream of my hilarious children with beautiful teeth and a house bought by a reality show, I’m going to hope for the best and say that Johnny is doing whatever he needs to survive right now.  But he needs to figure out a better plan, one that doesn’t see him struggling for survival every single week.  Hopefully if he survives this week and someone on the other side of the house wins HOH (and by that I mean James, since we all know Meg can’t), John can finally team up with them and start bringing down Austwins.  

5. Steve

JAIME: I’m starting to think that Steve may have us all fooled.  His archnemesis Becky named him one of the best players in the house, and I think there’s something to be said for his lowkey approach.  His brief reign as HOH proved that he doesn’t necessarily make the best decisions under fire, but then again, he knows that people think he’s weak and not really doing too great when it comes to handling himself in the game.  I think he still trusts Austwins a lot more than he should, but if he stays good with them, I think he’ll skate through this week.  I’m still waiting for a clear, unmistakable sign that he’s got some larger plan going on, but I don’t know.  Either everyone’s giving him way too much credit or Steve might turn out to be some kind of criminal mastermind.

GARRETT: I think he definitely happened to fall into his current situation. Vanessa has guided him along in this game, and set him up in a good position when it was her controlling things in those early weeks. But I’ll give him credit for playing both sides in the double eviction and shifting the blame completely off of him. That Meg doesn’t blame him for Jackie’s eviction may turn out to be a major blessing and keep him in the house, because the Austwins don’t seem to want him out either. He wins competitions when he has to and has become more and more well liked as the game is progressing. He’s no Ian Terry, but this season, it seems like he might not need to be.

4. James

GARRETT: James is making a run at America’s Favorite Player, and has gotten a perfect edit on CBS. He’s lively, fun, and refuses to let the house get boring, which is good for the houseguests’ morale and keeps things interesting on the feeds. He’s on a clear side, but because of his personality, he doesn’t seem to be a target at the moment. He has a chance to sneak by until a late stage and can get on a competition winning streak if he has to. Hopefully, after a jury member comes back, James can grab power again and break up the triad, but I wouldn’t quite count on it with Meg in his ear.

JAIME: The only thing working against James right now is that he doesn’t have a stronger partner.  He’s only going to be able to do so much when the person supporting his every move is Meg, and I don’t think it’s really occurred to him how much he needs John and Steve to eventually break up the Austwins block.  Based on numbers alone, James isn’t exactly in a great spot, but if he’s smart enough to realize that he’s in the minority of the house and can do something to turn things in his favor, then he’ll be around for a while.

3. Julia

JAIME: Once again, Julia and Liz are going to be totally safe for another week.  There are so many reasons why I want Liz and/or Austin evicted, but one of them is because I feel like Julia would absolutely work with the other side of the house.  It would force her to actually play the game, which isn’t something her alliance has really had to do so far.  She also might be in the best position out of the three of them, because I think breaking up Austin/Liz might be the bigger priority than breaking up the twins.  She’s going to be here for a while, and I’m just waiting for her to do something soon to justify her safety in the game.

GARRETT: Julia has still never played in a Veto competition. That has to be some kind of record. I think our only hope for her this week is her getting mad at Austin for giving Liz a hickey, and making the move to the other side of the house next week.

But that won’t happen. (Sigh)

2. Liz

GARRETT: She got through a week in power without pissing anyone off, and now that Austin’s in control, she won’t be blamed when the next houseguest gets evicted. She might be in the best position in the house, because she’s got two votes to keep her no matter what. But I don’t like her one bit, and her cattiness is beyond on my nerves. She’s never been in a position of danger yet, and I hope somebody wakes up and puts her there at some point. But it won’t happen this week.

JAIME: I still don’t understand how Austwins aren’t the biggest targets to everyone in the house.  When you look at it logically, Liz is the center.  She needs to be the second target on everyone’s list, behind Vanessa.  And yet for some reason, she’s totally escaped notice.  If the other houseguests don’t wake up, she, her sister, and Austin are going to make it to the final four, if not the final three, and they haven’t even really done anything to justify their place there.  It’ll entirely be the other houseguests’ fault for not breaking up the most solid block in the house.

1. Austin

JAIME: Throughout the week, I’m sure many of you often heard a strange noise, something like a cat dying or dishes being thrown against walls.  Those noises were me crying out for help every time they showed Austin kissing Liz.  His winning HOH means it’s going to continue to happen, and there’s nothing I can do about it.  Unfortunately, he’s solid in the game right now: with Becky gone and Steve and John still more or less working with both sides, Austin’s got the most powerful alliance in the house.  He, Julia, and Liz are going to continue to work as one unit until someone finally has the sense to break them up, but the other houseguests are running out of time.  I don’t think Austin’s going anywhere for a while, which means we’re going to see more of what he and Liz get up to in the HOH bed, which means I’ll probably be drinking a lot this week to forget.

GARRETT: It’s absolutely crazy that Austin has still never been nominated for eviction. Not one time. He’s actually well liked by a lot of them in there, even though he’s a cocky asshole. Another week of him in the HOH room calling the shots is going to be unbearable, so my feeds watching this week will be minimal. I want him gone, but I have to give the guy credit for his gameplay. He really just might win the whole thing, and if he does, he’ll be one of the least liked winners in the history of the show. Let’s just hope it doesn’t come to that and the rest of the houseguests come to their senses. You never know. Maybe someone will finally see that he doesn’t wash his hands after using the bathroom.